Friday, April 8, 2011

Celebrity Weekend Round-up: Mariah Carey is still pregnant.

It's Friday, people, GET EXCITED.

People sure were excited for Friday all week at work. Remember the dry erase board artists? They struck again (sort of):

The "art" if you will accumulated slowly throughout the week. Today? GONE. All of it. I was sure I'd come in and some other clever individual would have some beautiful Friday artwork. Maybe they'd pull out the purple and yellow markers and design a Friday message so mind-blowing that we could all pack it up and immediately go home.

Instead some sourpuss erase the whole thing. Boo to you, sourpuss.

Let's celebrate this weekend with a few celebrity stories, shall we? Think of it as some virtual dry erase board art all up in your business.

First, Mariah Carey is still pregnant, and celebrated by taking some nudie pics with her husband.

Ok, so, why does it feel like Mariah Carey has been pregnant for 18 years? I expect, any day now, for US Weekly to run an article about how Mariah Carey gave birth in a bathtub full of Dom Pérignon and celebrated her twins' graduation in the same day. Cigars, birthday cake and placenta for everyone!

The pregnant body is beautiful and blah blah blah, but really? you're going to describe them as NASTY? I bet  Mariah Carey has a whole room in her mansion dedicated to hiding her embarrassing photography, including the picture where she painted her pregnant belly with a picture of a butterfly.

Mariah Carey has the cray-cray.

In reality TV news, MTV has ordered Jersey Shore spin-offs for three of the cast members. There goes the neighborhood. And by neighborhood, I mean a whole generation of teenagers.

Please join me in a rousing chorus of NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

What else, what else...Oh, Kevin Federline needs to be fixed. Seriously, whoever is telling him that continuing to procreate needs to stop. I'm thinking about putting a little donation button over on the sidebar for "Kevin Federline Vasectomy Awareness".

Some math!!

Kevin Federline + model/prettylady/popsinger = babies X 5 / 3 mommies

Now that's math I can get behind.

If Kevin Federline can have that many children with that many pretty girls, there's hope for everyone out there.

Your thoughts on any of these stories? What did I miss (besides a lot)(actually, pretty slow news week this week). Sound off!

13 comments:

MrsJenB said... Reply to comment

The cray-cray...I am going to start using this all the time. Totally.

KLZ said... Reply to comment

Kevin Federline makes infertile couples everywhere feel awful. Like more awful. What is wrong with this world?

The Random Blogette said... Reply to comment

DUDE...I have always thought that Mariah Carey was nutso. Well she did have a breakdown some time ago, but I guess the cray-cray never really goes away. I also think that it gets worse when you get pregnant.

Who would want K-Fed's peeny inside them anyways. he must be really good in bed or really hung. Either way he is still gross.

Jersey Shore...I can't get enough of them. I have a problem.

Sarah Mac said... Reply to comment

I wish it WASN'T Friday yet!! I've had so much fun down here in the FL sun!

I would gladly contribute to the "Kevin Federline Vasectomy Awareness" fund. That guy does NOT need another child! Yikes.

Foreign Mama said... Reply to comment

I could totally use a bathtub full of Dom Perignon. Although, I would not want to give birth in it. And yes, it feels like Mariah Carrey has been pregnant ever since before I got pregnant, and my boy is 2.5 months old already.

Unknown said... Reply to comment

This is why I read you blog. I don't pay attention to the celebrity stuff. Totally agree about mariah - I even forgot she was pregnant b/c it's been so long. And Federline? Yeah, he needs to just stop. Ew.

Jackie said... Reply to comment

My TMI alert for pop culture this week was Charlie Sheen's crazy lust for Mila Kunis...and that he actually thought he could lure her to his House of Win. It does seem like it was a slow news week though....didn't seem to ready my People and E! as much as normal! Have a great weekend!

Jessica said... Reply to comment

Somehow I missed that KFed was still breeding. That really needs to be stopped.

Anonymous said... Reply to comment

I agree, no more Jersey Shore ANYTHING. I don't wanna see or hear about those idiots ever again.

Maggie said... Reply to comment

"The cray-cray" is now officially my favorite new phrase. :) Also, I'm pretty sure Mariah's been pregnant for about a year and a half...

Liz said... Reply to comment

When it's announced she delivered in Dom, you're blog will shoot to the top of the celebs mags, positioned right next to Perez.

I love that math, too. I'd like to see some more. What about Seal and Heidi. There's some math to be had there, right? :)

Stephanie in Suburbia said... Reply to comment

I'm totes on team cray-cray.

I'm a little confused about Natalie Portman. Namely, what part of her soul did she have to sign over for Black Swan that also required her to do that Ashton Kutcher one and the awful looking medieval one with those guys who are sooo not funny?

JMJE said... Reply to comment

Ha, MC is definitely giving birth in a bathtub filled with Dom and yes it does feel like she has been prego forever. I was also disturbed to hear both the news about all the Jersy Shore spinoffs and the birth of KFed's 15th child.

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