Tuesday, November 9, 2010

The day I went crazy over a banana

I love bananas.

I eat a banana every day for my mid-morning snack. You know, because of my ravenous monster baby. And although I'd rather eat a hash brown or cookie, I try to stick with healthy stuff while I'm at work. It's so people wont' get all judgy with me.

I'd also like to say that eating this daily banana has kept me from having ridiculously painful evening leg cramps. A little free advice to other pregs out there from me. You're welcome.

(When I typed "cramps", I first spelled it c-r-a-p-s, something else you other pregs are probably intimately familiar with. I almost left it like that.)

Anyway. Bananas.

I got this bunch of bananas at the store the other day. Actually, I almost put them back on the banana shelf because the top two in the bunch were enormous. Like, they made me physically uncomfortable to look at. I'm thinking to myself, that's like a banana and a half -- who can eat a banana that large?

But I brought it to work with me and had to capture the moment for Twitter.

It's as long as my keyboard! I mean seriously!

This is where all y'all who aren't on Twitter are gonna get jealous. My Twat friends saw this picture yesterday. Along with this status.

Then Surferwife got into it. She was the ONLY person who commented on my big banana, and I am ashamed for the rest of you. I thought for sure I'd get some kind of reaction from you closet pervs but whatever. Surferwife is pretty much my main instigator and troublemaker on Twitter. She's like my friend in college that would sit with me and talk the whole time so we'd both get in trouble.

Later I tried to bribe Liz with a gigantic banana into making her response to me her 10,000th Tweet. I was 9,992. But apparently she just doesn't like big bananas.

Later than that, Surferwife told me I was out of control and it was the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.

So what's the point of this random blog?

1. Bananas are delicious.
2. Sometimes they are too large.
3. If you don't have Twitter or use it regularly, you're seriously missing out on awesome stuff like this.
4. I can make a blog entry out of just about anything, apparently.
5. This post is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S. (What one of you did not have that song already running through your head? We cannot be friends if you didn't.)

I'm sure you sickos have lots to say about this banana post, try to keep your heads out of the gutters as you are responding lest I write a blog about my love of the word "balls".

What's your favorite fruit? Do you have Twitter? Would you like to follow me (it's @amandaaustin). Are you disappointed that I haven't written for, like, a week, and I put up gibberish like this?

27 comments:

foxy said... Reply to comment

I feel like The Twat is stealing all of my blog friends. And I hate that. I don't see ya'll around here near enough.

I do, however, love bananas. I should eat more of them. Would they perhaps help with the cramps AND the craps, ya think??

I'm soooo glad I was singing that song in my head. I would've hated to break up with you over something like that.

Caitlin MidAtlantic said... Reply to comment

OMG I can ONLY think of comments that are in the gutter for this post! HAHA!

I love my bananas as big as I can get 'em. And by bananas, I am not talking about the fruit.

Kara Hoag said... Reply to comment

I apologize that I hate Twitter. I could have delighted you with dirty comments because that is all that was running through my head when I read this post.

Just to make you happy though:

With a banana that size, you should probably keep it in the wrapper.

Is it a myth that size matters with bananas? Do the big ones really taste better than the small ones?

and

It probably won't be that bad, you just have to know how to eat it right.

karahoag.blogspot.com

Deidra said... Reply to comment

As long as your keyboard...
yes, there should definitely be some good responses to this.
But I don't want to make you blush. ;)

Kerr said... Reply to comment

Love bananas, esp big ones
the song is now in my head, and I am sure it will be all night long, thanks.
I dont twitter but I think I might have to start!

Anonymous said... Reply to comment

I don't utilize Twitter to its full capacity, obvs, because I am missing awesome stuff like this!
Isn't that the same pic that Brett Favre texted??

Allyson said... Reply to comment

I guess my first observation is that K must be one lucky SOB to have a wife who can put THAT in her mouth. What do you have? A flip-top head? Because, I've heard...THAT is the perfect woman. I guess it's different if you're actually eating the banana because there's no repetitive in, out motion. I have to jet now. Time to do Pilates on my balls. I have to look good for my next trip back to K-Y. How's that? ;)

poet said... Reply to comment

i have a twitter account, but i must admit i seem dense on how to use it. i like bloggers and blog comments much better.

nice banana, btw~

Hutch said... Reply to comment

Now I want to do a post about my Christmas song "Balls" perhaps you should take reader submissions. And yay, I have BANANAS (too lazy to put the dashes) out of my head thanks to Big Shiny Balls!

The Blogging Goddess said... Reply to comment

Yes, sometimes they are just too big to eat. And, whoever said bigger was better was just wrong. I've had my fair share of big bananas and small ones, not that I eat a ton of them...well, you know where I'm going with this...

Anonymous said... Reply to comment

I missed your banana tweet. Also, don't stop loving me but I don't think I'm really into Twitter. I feel a little foolish on there.

The good news is that I still have that song running round my wee brain.

Ms. Ro Chelle said... Reply to comment

I couldn't even spell bananas until that song. Thank Gwen Stefani.

Liz said... Reply to comment

Twitter rocks!

I didn't see the original tweet with the photo of this gigantor banana. But you are right - it's HUGE!

I guess I was so focused on my big achievement that I missed your tweet. Cuz I totally would have said something otherwise!

Lisa said... Reply to comment

A) favorite fruit = yes. I LOVE fruit! I also used to take a banana to work with me as my morning break snack every day, but that was once upon a time ago when I worked day shift.

B) I have twitter, but I don't generally use it for its intended purpose. I gotta be honest and say it's basically a way for me to update fb statuses and share pictures on the go.

C) I will follow you on twitter for sure now, even though I'm rarely on there enough to make fantastically random comments. (@LMCarden)

D) Hell no, I'm super amused by your giant banana! I could live on blog posts like this...and cheese. I love cheese.

The Random Blogette said... Reply to comment

I absolutely love this. When I came to read the post yesterday the picture didn't show up so I didn't comment because I didn't understand the hugeness of the banana. Now I do. All hail the giant banana.

And yes I follow you on Twitter but I am never on there. I don't have a cool phone to do twitter on. The hubs is mean to me like that.

Sarah Mac said... Reply to comment

My favorite kind of fruit is FLORIDA fruit. Like Publix strawberries. I wish I lived in the south so I could get better tasting fruit. I like bananas but then I always burp up banana flavor the rest of the day (think I get that from Mommo).

You post more frequently than I do. SAD FACE.

KLZ said... Reply to comment

I cannot believe I missed this mess yesterday. It just further proves that all day work meetings are ruining my life.

Chicken said... Reply to comment

I used to love bananas. Especially the huge ones *wink, wink*. BUT my baby put a stop to that. Whenever I eat a banana I vomit now. I guess this child hates bananas, I wonder if it's even my child. Paternity test as soon as I pop it out!

Random Musings said... Reply to comment

I love bananas too... But that is one big banana

SurferWife said... Reply to comment

I have never been so flattered in my whole life.

Surferwife is pretty much my main instigator and troublemaker on Twitter.

This brings big fat banana flavored tears to mis ojos. I just re-read this blog with Bananrama playing Cruel Summer in the background.

I feel like you like me. You really, really like me.

Is that a banana in your uterus? Oh no, it's a penis. A little baby penis is growing inside of you.

Oh, also, Allyson asking if you had a fliptop head almost killed me just now.

Crazy Shenanigans-JMO said... Reply to comment

So for the first time in the entire time I've known you, I'm uncomfortable. That banana is huge and awkward and uncomfortable to look at. I can't help it! Ekkk! I'm not eating bananas for a long time now.

Stephanie in Suburbia said... Reply to comment

That def. made me uncomfortable.

For one, bananas TOTALLY help the leg cramps, they are the bestest.

My fave breakfast: banana w/ 1 TBSP peanut butter in a bowl. Put boston cream pie yogurt over it. Sprinkle Grape Nuts Cereal.

KellyMellyBoBellyBananaFanna said... Reply to comment

Hello, Mr. Banana. Holy cow, you're long.

Kelly

JMJE said... Reply to comment

Yeah now I have the banana song in my head. Except that it's Kelly from the Office singing....this day is bananas B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

Kelly @ turned UP to ELEVEN! said... Reply to comment

I love bananas, the bigger the better. Ok that's not true but I figured it might enlist a few "That's what she said" comments. I do love bananas though but my body apparently is mildly allergic to them. If I eat one alone it makes my mouth and face itch like crazy... if I eat it in a protein shake, or say cereal I'm good to go so that's how I roll with B-A-N-A-N-A-S!

Sarah With Scissors said... Reply to comment

Okay if ONLY I'd come back a week earlier. SO MANY DIRTY COMMENTS FLOWING THROUGH MY MIND! And yes, that banana should be in a viagra add. Or an Ax commercial.

For the record... I hate bananas. Have hated them my whole life. As a baby when my mom tried to feed them to me I chewed them up and spit them out. I've decided this is a metaphor for my dating life.

Can't believe I've been gone for so long.

vonimoller said... Reply to comment

I Love bananas Mmm!! I even voted on your poll about them lol!
I'm VERY upset i DIDNT see the pic on twitter! I wouldve commented for sure!!
Actually i like banana gibberish blog posts it's funny. I LOVED baby blogworthy you posted about gravy was in stitches from giggling!! I love gravy 2 Mmm :)~

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