If watching brain surgery isn't blogworthy, I don't know what is

I had to decide this morning which topic I'd blog about first: how my husband lost a jar of peanut butter or my story about how I watched a brain surgery for two hours. Brain surgery wins. For today; y'all will have something to look forward to tomorrow.

My day job is a web editor for a health system. I'm also pitching in with handling media calls when they come in, like requests for photography or interviews, etc. until they hire a new media person. So Tuesday, one of my co-workers (also pitching in) asked me to escort a photographer during a surgery. Uncharacteristically, I said yes immediately. I'd like to think it was was Lady Luck and her good friend Fate that made me say yes. They wanted me to see someone's brain, I guess.

This escort was the first time I had been in a surgical suite while I was awake and not under anesthesia. I met the photographer, we put on our gauzy jumpsuits (which are called bunny suits -- when my coworker told me to ask for bunny suits, I had to make sure he wasn't trying to make me look foolish, but that's their for real name), our little gauzy hats and gauzy booties and walked to the suite. I'm like, cool, what kind of surgery and then I see a big 'ol brain up on the screen. OK, cool, you guys, I'm witnessing brain surgery.

It was a very specific type of brain surgery called Deep Brain Stimulation (DBS), used to treat lots of things, including several types of movement disorders (just call me "the Science Channel" if you want). It starts out while the person is asleep, then they drill a hole in their skull and open that sucker right up. Then, the neurologist sticks lots of electrodes into the brain to find the right spot to stimulate. Actually, lots might be stretching the truth a little. I don't know, everything I know about DBS I learned from Wikipedia, so it may not be accurate at all.

Here is how I explained it to Hubby:

Me: So, they open up the person's skull, and then they stick these big long things in, they are electrical things, and then it makes all this crackling noise, and do you know what that noise is? YOUR BRAIN. It's like, those things that connect in your brain? What are they called?* You know...
Hubby: I'm not sure I do...
Me: Ok, well anyway, the things that fire and make your brain work. Not real fire, like electrical signals. That's how your brain works. IT'S HAPPENING IN YOUR BRAIN RIGHT NOW!!! AND I GOT TO HEAR IT ON A COMPUTER!!!
Hubby: But, how was it on a computer?
Me: Oh yeah. Well the neurologist puts these electrical things...what would I call them? Like electrodes. He puts them on the patient's brain and the electrode is connected to this computer -- a regular computer! -- and it comes across as sound. And then they listen for certain sounds that the brain cells make and those brain cells are the ones that are giving the patient trouble, so those are the ones they stttiimmuullatttee.
Hubby: They can't do an MRI or something to find the bad cells?
Me: NO, it doesn't work that way.
Hubby: Why?
Me: Because it doesn't. Anyway, then they put this other electrode on the bad cell part and send electrical currents through it, and the patient has to be awake for this part. CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING AWAKE WHEN YOUR SKULL IS OPEN?
Hubby: Sure can't.
Me: ANYWAY. They have to be awake so that when the neurologist stttiimmuullatttees those cells, he can ask the patient what she's feeling. Like, once he asked if she saw wavy lines. Why would she be seeing wavy lines, I wonder?
Hubby: Why are you saying stimulate like that?
Me: I don't know. It's like I can't say it any other way. Stttiimmuullatttee.
Hubby: Was there much blood?
Me: Not much, THANK GOD!

I'm sure I left him with more questions than answers.

I think the most remarkable thing about the experience was how chilled out the surgeons were. You know how on TV, the surgeons are always just joking and talking and listening to music? All of that is true. I had no idea. But you know, they do this every day of their lives. Of course it's old hat to them. It's like someone who doesn't know Web coding watching me work, and they are like, OH MY GOD, I can't believe all these random letters, numbers and symbols, how do you make sense of it all and still listen to music!?!?

Ok, that's not the same as brain surgery at all.

It was still freakin' awesome. I love my job.